It’s a luscious mix of words and tricks

I don’t want to be an engineer.

All roads seemed to eventually be leading to something like managing a plastics manufacturing plant. I don’t want to be a manager of a plastics plant.

And I’m really not at all pretty certain this is what I want to do, but I’m double majoring in political science and psychology now.

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http://rednwhite.rotahall.org/?p=75

http://www.legacy.com/StarNewsOnline/Obituaries.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonId=101336622

This happened a couple of months ago but I couldn’t bring myself to connect what I had said in that post and what happened last January until now.

Live every second like its your last.

I can finally buy cigarettes and porn!

I had a really strange dream last night.  My friend was driving a van, just me and her.  I was in the very back row.  She ran a red light at a bridge, and we rapidly descended towards the water below.  Right before we hit, I took a very deep breath and woke up, literally seconds before my alarm went off.  Nifty.

I just listened to Imogen Heap’s Hide and Seek, and for some reason it instantly brought up something memorable my eighth grade social studies teacher had told our class. He had said that statistics had shown that by the time we all reached the age of 25, one of us would be dead. Of course we just blew that off as random trivia, but we couldn’t have been more naive and short-sighted of how little time we really have. Patience is a virtue, but it can be easy to slip into the delusion that things will change for the better, even though we know deep down that things won’t change. Extend every second you have to the fullest.

My life.

As of right now, I work two jobs.  I do trivial office work for two hours between classes Monday through Friday, then I work 4 nights a week as a waiter.  I’m going to class for the most part, aside for Chemistry, which is at 9 am.  I would go, but the professor offers no perspective on what it is we’re learning, meaning all we do is copy down the powerpoint notes he presents.  Said notes are also provided online, so there truly is no reason to go to class.  English is going decently enough. I managed to keep up with the journals we were supposed to do, but as for the one paper we worked on, I pretty much put it off to the last minute, and I’m not sure how that’s going to turn out.

My engineering class is interesting enough.  I have to design a fludic powered monorail as our design project, so that should be pretty fun.  I fucked up on the first couple of grades, but after those I actually put effort into what I was doing and things are looking better now.

Then psychology.  Without studying whatsoever I pulled off a 72, which is below the average of 77, but I’ll take it. Since it’s an intro class, it’s pretty much the same material I covered in high school, so although it may be fuzzy, at least I retained enough of the knowledge to pull off a 72.

Pre-Calculus has just been a review of what I did in high school so far, and I got an 87 on the first exam, again without studying.  I don’t think pre-cal is going to be that difficult.

Overall,  things aren’t going too bad.  I’m caught up with all of my work right now, but I have a feeling that I’m going to get immensely stressed out in the future.  I wasn’t studying during my free time which is why I decided that I might as well be making money during said time so I picked up that second job.  The good thing about working on campus is if you ever need time off, you can just tell them you’re working on a paper or something of that nature and they’ll let you go for the day.

I don’t think a career in engineering is going to lead to a happy lifestyle.

I’m hoping I’ll have an epiphany soon, and something will enter my life that will lead to a prosperous and enjoyable lifestyle, but I’ve yet to see anything.  Dunno.

Since it’s what I’ve been telling myself I was going to major in for essentially my entire life, I’m going to major in Engineering.

Which means I’ll be going to school here at UNCW going through their Pre-Engineering program, which essentially means that for my first two years I’ll take all the basic classes that everyone takes right here in town, and then transfer to NC State’s College of Engineering for my second two years. We’ll see where I stand after that.

Mein Schedule:

General Chemistry I

Intro To Engineering

Freshman Composition I

Precalculus

General Psychology

Taking Psychology only because it was one of the few classes still available and I really didn’t want to take Anthropology.

Also, here is what time I’ll be taking what class through the week.

Sometimes I feel worthless.

Then I stop and remind myself that we are all worthless.

My personalDNA Report